The Macy’s Thanksgiving parade is on, the Christmas tree is lit, baby gear is all over our house and I have a little 5lb baby boy dealing with hiccups and pushing his little butt into my ribs. I love it, every second of it.
I could sit here and write all the things I am thankful for…my amazingly patient husband, ruby slipper nail polish, an almost finished nursery, a Glee Christmas CD, a best friend bringing home her NICU grad this fall after 100+ days, my family, all my friends being pregnant and giving little CC besties, Short Term Disability paychecks and my AMAZING OB Dr. Fish… I could keep this list going. But there is one thing, one HUGE thing that in the wake of all our heartbreak this year that I am most thankful for, our growing baby boy.
I really have no clue how in the mist of all our loss this year, my family could have kept going with out our little CC growing and our faith that the end of 2010 is going to be a good one for us. He is the light of our dark year, our hope for renewed happiness and and our chance to feel normal again. I can NOT wait for Dec 10th! We have 15 days left, and every day he stays put is even more hope for no NICU. You will NEVER hear me want him born any earlier than he already is because I truly understand the miracle of every day. I can wait 15 more days, it’s so close anyways! So I am hoping and praying he waits until December 10th. It’s going to be one big Birthday Party at Healthpark that day and I can’t wait!
Our holidays will be different this year. I’m not avoiding the celebration or the joy because this year is a year to celebrate and Nolan, my brother, Grandpa and my Uncle along with all my other loved ones would want to see our family smile this Christmas. CC is going to make that happen especially when we dress him up in his Carters Santa outfit and take him to Midnight Mass! I am so stinking excited. He’s going to be our little Special Delivery.
So raise a glass, stuff your face with turkey and say a little prayer that CC waits 15 more days! I made it to Thanksgiving still pregnant! 2 more ultrasounds, 3 more appointments, a pre-op appointment next week and before we know it, he will be placed in our arms. OOOOHHHH so so so so close!
My Dad wrote a Thanksgiving letter on FB this morning, and I just have to share it because it really sums it up, 2010, the grief and the new hope. Love you Dad, you said it best!
A Letter to Our Friends,
It seems so wrong to celebrate a day of Thanksgiving when it seems there is nothing to be thankful for. Our beloved Charlie is gone, my wonderfully smart and funny brother Michael left us, and the anchor of the Bartens , E.H., could not hold on the life’s chain anymore. This is the start of the “Holiday Season” and I feel like, so what.
Well I’ll tell ya so what; I have a beautiful wife and 2 ladies at OSU! I have a daughter and fantastic son in law that loves her dearly, who are also prego with their 2ND child. I have a wonderful and sweet adopted daughter (thank you Charlie). There is Trina’s sister who is the best aunt these kids could ever have. I have my brothers and sisters and their families, up north. On Dec. 10th I will celebrate 1yr of successful heart surgery. Oh! December 10th, is also the day that my 2nd grandchild is to be born.
So yes , there are things to be thankful for. I am alive, I have family, friends, and a new baby coming. This does not mean I am not still mourning our losses. There isn’t a day goes by that I do not wish that my son, brother and father-in-law were still here with us. Living day by day is so difficult at times. But I am also thankful for a renewed Faith that keeps me strong for the rest of my family.
So, on this Thanksgiving Day, be thankful for and take good care of what you have. Thank the Good Lord this Holiday Season and ask him for the strength to renew faith.
Happy Thanksgiving and God Bless,
Happy Thanksgiving friends, I love you all for your continued support, encouraging words and the love you have given my family this year. I am thankful for every single one of you!