Saturday, July 11, 2009


I HATE you Preeclampsia!
I HATE you even more stupid HELLP Syndrome!
I hate you more than anything in the world right now!
You robbed me of my child and I can never forgive you for that.
Hate is such a strong word, but I honestly 100% HATE you!

And now because of you two, I am determined to learn everything there is about you to the best of my ability- thanks for ruining my free time.
(that's the medical professional in me wanting to do this too)

Thanks, I needed to get that out.


Lisa (Jasper's Mommy) said...

I'm so sorry you lost your precious Nolan to that horrible Pre-e and Hellp. I too lost my son Jasper to pre-e on 3/6/09 at 25 weeks he weighed 13.2 oz. If you ever need to talk my email is I will also add you to the list of blogs i'm following.

cmatsukes said...

Its ok to hate I HATE Cancer because it took my best friend my mother the only person in the world who loves you uncondtionally no matter what you do So I understand I HATE Cancer and even though I lost my mom that cancer is dead too now so for that I am happy about. So ashley I understand it is not a bad thought at all not at all. Get all the information you can on it so it never will do that to you again you derserve alot of children you will be a great mom.

Rachel Tenpenny Crawford said...

I found you because you became a follower of my blog Waiting For Morning ( I lost my little girls Aubrey and Ellie. I love this post. I love your honesty and how you vent it. I share your hate, but for me I hate premature labor. It stole both my babies from me. This bravery you have, your willingness to be honest with how you feel, will only help you heal. I speak from experience. You cannot find peace until you purge out EVERYTHING! I am still no over the death of my girls but I can honestly say that one year later I have peace along with my sadness. And I got to this place by being brutally honest. It hurts so much to lose a child. SO MUCH. But I promise there is peace for you...your honesty will get you there. You will see your little man patient for Heaven. He waits for you there. Probably hanging out with my girls. I will pray for you.