It's never going to be easy. I miss Nolan like crazy. Both Chris and I miss him, he was so charming. I can't even explain how perfect he was. I wish I could just jump in our car and drive to Healthpark and see our little man. I would do anything for that! Everyday is a struggle, everything reminds us of our baby Nolan. His unfinished room, the numerous amounts of baby magazines I am still getting in the mail and even the picture I have on my cell phone. I just miss him.
So if you have any children, go hug them a little closer, give them an extra kiss and thank God you can do those two things. There's nothing more in this world that I would rather do then give my baby another kiss.
We found a very special place for our baby to be laid to rest forever. It's perfect, peaceful and serene. I think he will like it there. God, I never thought I would be planning this even just a week ago. Nolan was still suppose to be in my belly and I had plans on him making his appearance after 30 weeks. It sure does show God has other plans.
It's going to be a long time before we feel semi-normal again, so please just bear with the both of us. We're going to church tomorrow with the whole family, it just seems like the perfect time to go. Father Bob said this weeks mass is about celebration of life, how perfect.
I will post Nolan's memorial service information tomorrow afternoon. We have a few more details that need to be finalized.
I love you Nolan, there isn't one moment I don't think about you. I wish you could have stayed with us but understand the fight for you was just too much. Please look out over us. We love you always.